You know that YouTube blackhole that’s it’s easy to get sucked into? One minute you’re watching a video showing you how to make a great beef stroganoff, you click on the next recommended video, and an hour later find yourself watching a three-hour ASMR video on the Mexican moon landing conspiracy?
Well, that’s like me with second-hand books.
I can merrily pour out a stream of consciousness on the page for hours, but at some point, this stuff has to start to make sense and fit within a larger narrative. And pulling together all the loose ends of a first draft is like connecting up boiled spaghetti into a single pasta thread.
My brain says, “Karl, you’re an idiot, why are you spending all this time writing. No-one wants to read this nonsense.” And so I get into a negative spiral: Why am I bothering to do this? Is anyone even reading what I’m writing? What’s the point of publishing a post every single day?
I wear a Fitbit Ionic watch which tracks my heart rate throughout the day and night. Before new year my average resting heart rate was between 63 and 66, but since I started writing daily my average heart rate is now between 57 and 59 and has been consistently for two weeks.